Here's your proof

As time wears on, old theories still hold true.  Things our parents told us actually turn out to be right.  Let's look at the assumption that girls mature faster than boys.  Recent national studies have shown that girls have performed oral sex on a boy by the time they turn fourteen.  Is this really the sort of act any female wants to engage in as soon as possible?  Is high school not terrible enough that they need the added pressure of performing blow jobs?  Young men are not racking up numbers as high as young women when it comes to carrying out this act.  Mature does men adult and grown up, so it must be true.  Girls DO mature faster than boys.  Congratulations ladies!  Wipe your mouths, check your teeth, and give each other a hand.  Speaking of hands, don't even get me started on hands....

We get it! You're in love. Shut up

As a joke, I made my boyfriend agree to put that we were in a relationship with each other on Facebook.  The backlash he received from his male friends was so hilarious to us both, we decided to keep it that way.  Secretly, I kind of like it because, let's face it, I am a woman and I am constantly competing with other women whether they know it or not.  Mainly, it was just supposed to be a temporary joke that became funnier when we made it permanent.
I am fully aware that it is our behavior and general demeanor that make it apparent that we are in a relationship with each other.  Becoming "Facebook official" was not something that kept me up at night or made me cry to my girlfriends (er, girlfriend, singular, not plural).  It may be cute to post something on Facebook every now and then about your significant other and how wonderful they are or how much in love you are.  I think it's a nice way to commemorate your wedding day or the birth of a child.  I am more concerned with the constant daily reminders of how much you love your boyfriend or girlfriend.  We get it.  You're in love.  Yippee.  I'm in love and you don't see me bragging about it every time you get online.  We can't even remember to take pictures together, let alone tag that we are someplace together, let everyone know we're there because we love to be places together, take pictures there to immediately upload to Facebook, tag THOSE pics, then produce status updates about said pictures and locations with more tags.
So I'm sorry my friends, if you want to be able to tell if I'm in love with my boyfriend, you're just going to have to do it the old fashioned way.  Find out what bar we're in and watch us get drunk and make out.  Romance and class delivered.

Ummm, what the?

I have a confession.  I enjoy watching terrible reality television while I do mundane chores around the house such as folding laundry.  I am especially entertained by shows that feature single women trying to figure out why they are still single.  I. Love. These.  Women.  They make me feel extremely confident and intelligent.
I am surprised at this Oprah inspired movement of "vision boards" and "dealbreaker" type lists.  We all have preferences and pet peeves, but why must these women write them down?  Do they have dementia?  I know I don't like guys that are pussies and can't drink hard liquor.  I'm not afraid I'll forget that and accidentally wind up in a relationship with a wimp that can't fight and only orders daiquiris.  Also, these women all say they want a good looking guy that doesn't cheat.  Oh, good.  Glad you put that on paper.  The rest of us are in the market for ugly men that sleep around.  THAT'S probably why I got cheated on.  I never bothered to write down that fact that I dislike it.
I can't even wrap my mind around the vision boards.  If you find yourself with so much spare time that you are cutting out pictures of celebrities and jewelry store ads to compile your idea of the perfect relationship, then you are way too single and way too crazy to even handle dating a real man.  I can't ever imagine a sane, capable man saying "I really hope I find a woman one day that has already put unreachable expectations on me before she's even met me.  I hope she takes me to her room one day and shows me an adult arts and crafts project of her imagination and says I'm the lucky man that fits the mold."
So ladies, stay away from the scissors and the glue sticks and the lists.  Use that time to figure out why you're not attracting the right man.  It can't be all their fault.  What daddy issues and mistakes other men have made are you blaming every one else for?  Really look for answers to those questions.  Or just learn to cook.  Either way, stop putting your psychosis down on paper.  The evidence is damaging.